Tuesday, November 24, 2009

So I murdered my muse month or so ago...

Unlike Bob's shooting of the sheriff, mine was not in self-defense. It wasn't a shooting either... more a drowning. Just like the well meaning but inexperienced pastor who, while upriver doing his first dipping into the murky waters of river_X baptism of his flock, forgot the words of the baptismal prayer and as he grasped desperately for the elusive incantation lurking somewhere in the recesses of his brain, succeeded in keeping his would be new devotee under the water much longer than the poor fellow could hold his breath.... and thus the good Lord's will was done or so the heartbroken mother and devout follower of Christ would later allude; So too would my muse, in what can only be summarised as an unfortunate event, fall to the zealous ministrations of a spiritual devotee... me in this case.

Having read somewhere and believed (to read is to believe, no?) the supposed magical properties of absinthe - the green fairy, and having for the last few months been suffering a serious bout of the block, I went in search of this fairy. Slaying numerous dragons of fear and doubt that lay in my way, and leaving in my wake half empty bottles of rum and of coke (a cola), thus discarded unconsumed as I tried to cleanse my body of any intoxicant that could in one way or the other hinder the workings of this magical spirit, I finally sighted this holy grail (more like a watered down version) of the writing world on the shelve of the local alcohol dispensary of my town. Imagine that.

So, to cut a short story short, I partook and I passed out. When I came to, my muse was no more.

Of Toothless Dogs and their incessant barking

There was a time not too long ago when calling me a girl would have gotten your face punched in... not by me mind, but by the legion of loyal fans that I had somehow amassed in the relatively short span that was my meteoric rise to fame.... That legion, btw, has since disappeared in pretty much the same way that my star burnt itself out... unceremoniously.

Twice now, in less than a week, two girls have gone on to call me a girl to my face and I have done nothing but cower in the hole that I eventually sunk into.... not that I would hit a girl... heck, I don't beat girls except, perhaps, when in a race to reach an orgasm... thanks to having what one might call an unfair advantage in the form of hair trigger something or the other.

I don't know if it's something I said or the way I said it. Boy do I miss those fans.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

One Score and a half......

Or to be more precise, one score and 9 years ago today, folks, unto a young beautiful woman hailing from along the ranges known as the Aberdares in the heart of the Kenyan highlands, a new babe was born.

Today while the rest of the world marches along on its quest for survival or whatever ambitions drive it, seemingly oblivious of our very existence, the owner of this blog has declared this day a holy day... nay, a holiday... nay... arghhh who friggin cares. Thing is, we don't gotta do shit coz you know what, it's his effing birthday.

So here's to doing nothing.